Not Into Coincidences

It happened several times. I’m not really sure if it’s coincidences. Maybe more like… fate?

Okay. Here it goes. Personally, I do believe in destiny. I’ve grew up reading fairytales and believing that everything happens because there’s this more powerful God making it happen.

And somehow… maybe it did happen to me. No not destiny. But I’ve been a victim of that was-it-really-just-a-coincidence moment. I’ll tell two recent stories.

First happened last March. I dreamed about a guy. The guy I thought I almost had a relationship with. The guy I thought I was destined with but is now dating someone else exclusively.

In my dream, we seemed to be at a luncheon which was set up outside a huge house. There was a long table and there were other guests. We were sitting opposite each other at one far end of the table. But we weren’t talking. It was so awkward.

When I woke up, I was like, “what the hell!?”

I hate it when I remember him. And that time, I’m not sure I had finally moved on from what happened. So all day, even at work, I was seriously wondering why I dreamed about him. I’ve learned to trust my dreams already. That when I dream of something and I happen to remember it, it somehow happens.

So when I went home from the office, when I rode the bus even I was standing inside, I was kind of relieved that nothing happened that day. But when I gazed at the windows that becomes a mirror of people inside because of the glass reflection, I saw him. He was also standing a mere 3 feet away from me.

I’m not sure if he saw me too that time. But he must have. I turned my back and faced the opposite side, slowly, making sure he wouldn’t notice.

Then the girl in front of him called me. She said she’s getting off and I could take her seat. I was almost hesitant. Because even if he didn’t see me at the mirror window, sitting there will make him definitely see me.

Reluctanly, I still took the seat. But the moment I was seated, I pulled my earphones from my bag and pretended I was sleeping. It was so awkward that make me think about what happened in my dream. It was almost the same. We were there, we have the chance, but we weren’t talking.

And then the second was this. It happened just a while ago, actually.

We have this Kris Kringle thing at the office. The theme issomething that reminds you of your previous someone. Not my thing actually. Especially that I don’t really want to be reminded of any previous someone.

After what happened with me and that guy I was talking about above (which I think is better as personal story than a blog post, really). I met someone. And maybe I was destined to have almost relationships, but not real ones.

So, when they said I need a gift about a previous someone, I was thinking about this new guy. There was a lot that reninds me of him. But maybe the most is our love for Ed Sheeran. Especially his album, Multiply. That was the only thing that we share the same. That was why for a while, I stopped listening to Ed’s songs because I don’t want to remember him.

So I figured, I could get an Ed Sheeran key chain.

And when I was about to get home, I saw him. Really. The new guy. He was standing ahead of me, looking at me. I took a double look when I realized it was him. I held on to my pocket where the key chain was, suddenly afraid that it might fall and he would see.

I gave him a fake smile. Something I hoped didn’t look fake at all. And after that, I didn’t look at his direction again.

So tonight, I was having a really hard time going to sleep because of this coincidences. But maybe those things were meant to happen for a reason beyond my understanding. But I would be glad to know why.